The Struggle For Words

One month and no words. So many thoughts. So many opinions. So many reasons to write. So many excuses why I didn’t. None of them valid. The ongoing delay involved my nemesis, procrastination, catching up with me and consuming almost every waking hour beyond my regular workday. Late nights of grading student work, preparing awards, planning holiday art projects, inputting grades, and reviewing tedious report card categories offered little time to “just sit and write.” Oh, how I love to “just sit and write!” Teaching pays the bills though, so of course I gave it my top priority and endured the limited sleep. Truth be told, I chose to “just sit and write” many times prior to that, instead of grading stacks of student work. So, I guess it was time for the pendulum shift. Add holiday shopping and celebrations into the mix too.

I would be remiss to not mention that the San Bernardino terror attack on December 2, 2015, left me speechless, as well. In the beginning, when I tried to write my thoughts for you, every word just seemed trivial. In the coming weeks, however, I do plan to share my thoughts with you on the topic. I’m ready. In the meantime, I will say that it was too close to home for me, literally. I live in a neighboring city, just five miles from the attack. No family member or friend of mine was a victim, but I knew (or knew of) people who were directly affected. And there you have it, the last reason. No words for almost five weeks.

My time management and organizational skills have been put to the test this year. Since starting the personal blog this year, I often find myself struggling to find the balance between teaching effectively, writing a weekly blog, writing for a local newspaper, eating more plant-based food, exercising consistently, getting 7-8 hours of sleep, and reading more. In addition, I try to make a conscious effort not to ignore, or alienate, my family and friends. So far, so good in that last category. I think.

This sounds a lot like whining; I know. What’s ironic is that, despite the struggle to balance, I absolutely love that I have finally shouted to the world, “I love to write!” I miss writing when I’m not doing it. So, I don’t believe that whining is the right word. I know that other people have similar struggles trying to find the perfect balance in their life. I am just being honest. I am being real. I am being vulnerable. That’s where my writing takes me. It takes me to the place deep down to the core of my inner thoughts and shows me what I am really feeling.

Writing is my ultimate happy place. People are important too. Being a writer can often cause an inner struggle between solitude and socialization though. Being alone with my ideas is necessary when writing. However, I have learned to recognize that simple things, such as a daily dinner conversation with my husband, an unexpected phone call from my son, or a 2+ hour visit with my grandma over a glass of red wine, allows me to take a breath of fresh air and recharge. Sometimes, it even adds new material for future projects. Multiple holiday celebrations brought a lot of quality time with immediate and extended family, so I am fully recharged and ready to write in 2016!

It was January 1, 2015 that I took the first step towards my writing goal. It was on that day that I chose my domain and website name. The next day began the process of learning how to create a personal blog website. Overall, the experience of creating and maintaining the site has been more rewarding than exhausting. I’m still smiling!

Image by Diane GPThere are still so many observations and thoughts waiting to be written in the New Year. Thank you for choosing to spend your time reading Life Through My Eyes DGP and walking this journey with me so far.

May you find good health, personal success, meaningful relationships and infinite joy in 2016.

 

 

5 Comments

  1. Happy New Year! Love reading your writings because I can relate to so many. I’m so happy we are friends and wishing you many more successful endeavors with your craft. Love ya!

  2. Glad to see LTME is back. Happy New Year!

  3. Happy New Year Cousin!

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